My First Christmas Without Jesus – 2012

Journal Entries:

January 22, 2013:

Christmas was sad this year. For the first time I felt no faith and no purpose for a Jesus.

Lack of faith was not the main reason for the sadness – it was the news and the realization that I have a lot of work to do regarding my beliefs. The Newtown school shooting on the 14th where 20 little kids and 6 adults were killed is still thick in the air even a month later.

Trying to work out these deeper ideas on religion and God, looking beyond the surface. Trying to sort out how and if any religious teachings are still tenable to me – what if any of it can possibly be true.”

Shocking – how did I miss this for so many years while I believed?
The Bible must always be interpreted. That is a problem because so much of it cannot be used if taken literally. The consequences of following the bible would be war. And horror!

“Bring to me those enemies of mine who would not have me as their King, and execute them in front of me” – JESUS (Luke 19:27)

But this is ridiculous.
Much of the world follows the preachments of a book which must not be taken literally?
How dangerous!

How rare must this be in the history of literature? What a strange book the Bible is – intended to be the direct word – written literally – at the inspiration of (or by) a God yet needing translations?

….and interpretations? being open to infinitely divergent claims.

So the bible is a book whose words MUST not to be taken exactly as they are written. Mulling this over.

Something is wrong with that. It can only be wrong.




January 29, 2013

“I feel the immediate need to get rid of all bullshit. I need to start with what I certainly no longer believe about my Christian religion and let the chips fall wherever they fall”

“I guess I don’t know what I believe exactly at this point, but I am sure I don’t believe a huge number of things.

“These non-beliefs seem to be forming a sort of anti-Nicene Creed:

“I don’t believe most Christians know their Bible and so their messages on faith are poorly grounded.
I don’t believe much of the Bible that I have read. I see that the Bible is too awful.
I don’t believe any kind of Hell is likely or possible.
I don’t believe in original sin. It makes no sense.
I don’t believe the Book of Genesis, Adam and Eve and all that.
I don’t believe human sacrifice can help any god or gods.
I don’t understand why human sacrifice is important in Christianity and I don’t believe it is justifiable.

“I don’t believe in the papacy.
I don’t believe saints can answer prayers.
I don’t believe certain places are holy.
I don’t believe in an afterlife

“I don’t believe Mary was a virgin and I don’t understand why it matters.
I don’t believe in prayers, as they are the same as wishing for something – and this is problematic and may be hurtful to one’s mental health.
I don’t believe prayers are answered.
I don’t believe it can be wrong to be a homosexual if it is supposed that god created them and therefore I don’t understand how the church can be against homosexuality.

“I don’t believe in transubstantiation and I no longer understand what it means or why it would matter.
I don’t believe in vicarious redemption or why any god or gods could possibly desire it.
I don’t believe in guardian angels since, if they existed no one would ever get hurt.”

Some things I do believe:

“Faith can have serious side effects

“It trivializes this life while it hugely worships death.
the damage of false hope
Suspension of reason is dangerous
Superstition is just as likely to result from faith as ‘useful’ spirituality (whatever that may mean – and it might mean nothing).
Faith in religion stifles free inquiry, which is crucial to useful knowledge.
Faith in a truckload of unseen things, which appear to be untrue and are un-testable, is a bizarre stand to take and should not be admired as a virtue.
Human sacrifice is a psychologically unhealthy ritual.”

– January 29, 2013


About Atheist Max

I'm a former Christian who became Atheist in middle age. My blog is a journal of how I lost religion and discovered a better life. For Peace, Civility and the Separation of Church and State
This entry was posted in agnostic, Atheism, god, godless, Nonbelief, Positive Atheism, religion, Right Faith, unbelief and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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